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A House Husband In India: Pride or Shame?

A House Husband In India: Pride or Shame?

The concept of househusbands might be rare in India but it is very much prevalent in western countries where men carry out all household duties while their wives are out to work.

The trailer of the upcoming film 'Ki and Ka', featuring Kareena Kapoor Khan and Arjun Kapoor, shows the working of a household where the so-called gender roles have been swapped. The film derives its title from linguistic gender divisions of the Hindi language found in the words 'ladki' and 'ladka' meaning 'girl' and 'boy'.

Househusband is a rare concept in India because role reversals are mostly not accepted in a patriarchal society like ours. Here, the men are sought to be the bread-earners and expected to lead. Even if a few men decide to sit at home and carry out household work to help their career-oriented wives pursue their professional goals, they face immense criticism from their immediate family members, neighbours and distant relatives as well .

We spoke to marriage counsellor Dr. Nisha Khanna about what kind of problems househusbands face in India. She is of the opinion that the numbers of househusbands has increased marginally in the country due to rising number of love marriages nowadays but the acceptance level is low.

Dr. Khanna, who is one of the most prominent marriage counsellors in Delhi with more than 10 years of experience in the field, said: "Househusbands are rare in India. If they take up household work, they are not welcomed by the society. They face harsh comments by their neighbours and relatives, who generally laugh behind their back."

"There are also chances that such husbands might get continuously hurt and later slip into depression , handling innumerable comments every day," said UTV Bindass 'Emotional Attayachar' fame relationship expert.

Not only that, they feel inferior in front of their wives as the society constantly puts them in poor light and draws comparisons between them and their wives, said Dr. Khanna, adding, this might affect their sexual life and self-confidence.

In the long run, their emotional quotient will come down. "They (househusbands) won't be able to recognize their own and other people's emotions. They won't be able to discriminate between different feelings and label them appropriately, and use emotional information to guide thinking and behavior."

On being asked about ways to deal with such situations, Dr. Khanna said: "Every couple in such a scenario should trust and respect each other for what they do. They have taken a decision and they should stand by it no matter what others have to say about it."

She added: "Mutual understanding is the key to make marriages work anywhere in the world."

( Image: Eros)

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