Mind Hacks

Resist the Temptation to Deflect Compliments

Shep McAllister, Gawker Media

Resist the Temptation to Deflect Compliments

Many of us, myself included, brush aside compliments in a subconscious effort to be self-deprecating, but this behavior actually does more harm than good.

If someone told me, ""hey, that's a really cool Minecraft build,"" my first instinct would be to say ""eh, you should go watch some YouTube videos, this is nothing."" While my deflection might have been factually accurate, and helped me avoid appearing smug, all I really did was contradict my conversation partner. The Art Of Manliness explains:

When someone offers you a compliment, they're saying that they've observed and assessed a praiseworthy quality in you. When you deflect or deny that praise, you're basically contradicting them; you're saying that they don't have good judgment, discernment, or taste, or that they're insincere - that they don't know what they're talking about. You're returning their kind words with an insult.

No matter how uncomfortable a compliment makes you feel, swatting it back at the person who offered it is just transferring your discomfort onto them. In most circumstances, it's better just to absorb it with a gracious ""thank you,"" and move on. It will make the complimenter feel good, and heck, you can even try to enjoy it yourself. For more advice on the subject, be sure to check out the source link.

How to Accept a Compliment With Class | The Art of Manliness

Photo by IdeaStepConceptStock (Shutterstock).

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